Cant you feel it?

My disease

2011-06-05T13:39:00.000-07:00

I'm the new final venture the new disease,

You will all come to finally see,

All the stains i have left to be,

All the people will beg me please,

But the dose is light i'll make it free,

This is my disease and its never free.

My head is cracking it breaks in two,

I can't believe i'm left with you,

I don't think i can see this through,

I lost the part of me i thought was true,

My paranoia has been confused,

You left me here broken and bruised,

Don't you get it you were used,

I think its funny how nothings true.

I'm a new adventure and the cure is free,

I filled your lungs with ecstasy,

Your lungs are black and fear is all you see,

You knew this was coming its only you and me.

Its only me..

I'm now the voice inside your head.

I'm now the fear in your bed.

I'm the disease in your head.

The shadow of my brain

2011-01-02T15:25:00.000-08:00

People tend to always see one way. No matter what anyone says, they have there own angle.
At the end of the day its that dark spot in the back of my head. That keeps me in check. That stops me from being like everyone else. I don't want anything. I don't deserve anything.
Now that i realize this, that is what makes me different. That is what keeps me seperated and on a whole other playing field from everyone else.

Its that dark spot.
I think of it as the part of my head with the shadow casting down.
The shadow of my brain.

In close

2009-06-13T23:36:00.000-07:00

What you want
What you get
All used up
This isn't a bet
Break a sweat
Down the face
Claw the back
At the same pace

I feel the pressure deep down in
Pulling tight and heavy breaths begin
My mouth begins to let out sounds
But you scream the loudest sounds

Hold you down
Down on your back
Pushed in tight
Ill try not to crack
I feel the heat
Down in your chest
Your pushed against me
But i cant rest

I feel the pressure deep down in
Pulling tight and heavy breaths begin
My mouth begins to let out sounds
But you scream the loudest sounds

just wake up

2009-06-13T23:31:00.000-07:00

Running wild in my head
I cant sleep cuz I'm not dead
I have this smile on my face
Is this happiness
I don't know yet
I wake up in the morning
And realize that I'm not sad
I'm wearing a smile and not mourning
This is something i don't think Ive had
I look in your eyes
And see I'm not blind
I look in your eyes
And feel so alive
I look in your eyes
And don't feel broken inside
Sometimes I don't see you
I know your right over there
Sometimes i wanna pull you here to me
I see the happiness there
There wont be pain in here
With me
I just wake up
I just wake up

I wake up in the morning
And realize that I'm not sad
I'm wearing a smile and not mourning
This is something i don't think Ive had
I look in your eyes
And see I'm not blind
I look in your eyes
And feel so alive
I look in your eyes
And don't feel broken inside
Just wake up
I just wake up
Just wake up
and hoped that you were here

deep inside of me

2009-06-13T23:24:00.000-07:00

Ok just wait
i dont know the end of it
ok just wait
cant you get the grasp of it
ok just wait
there is no end to it
ok fuckin wait
i will bring a end to it

Now its blowing through this place
its what you can not see
and it may be the end of me
im trying to run awayand find some place to hide
sorry there is no place to stay
there all hiding inside

ok just run
its coming after you
ok just runit is surrounding you
ok just hide
it wants the best of you
ok just run
it hasnt gotten the grasp of you

time has fallen underneath the sand
my thoughts are broken i dont understand
your will is strong and its all inside your head
kiss me then maybe i could understand
its just inside of me
its just inside of me

ok i will wait
and see the depth in your eyes
ok i will wait
even if im scared i wont make a lie
ok i will wait
maybe its you that makes me want to die
ok i will wait
and your eyes will watch everyday

come on now just wait
its all just deep inside your head
its all just falling in your face
come on and hold on to your head
its just deep inside of me
its just deep inside of me
its just deep even
just even inside of me

Time has run out

2009-05-03T21:07:00.001-07:00

Time cant really seem to tell,
How far i will drift down,
Even if you could measure how far i fell,
You will see i will always drown,

Here I,
Here I fall,
And sink down to the ground,
Here I,
Here I lay
And have no breath left to say,
Time has run out.

Maybe its that faded blue,
Or just the pressuring depth,
My body knows this is true,
But my mind is all thats left,

Here I,
Here I fall,
And sink down to the ground,
Here I,
Here I lay,
And have no breathe left to say,
Time has run out,
Time has run out.

left behind

2009-04-28T14:27:00.000-07:00

I hear the roaring thunder,
Inside the pouring rain,
I grip the wheel ever so tightly,
This is my domain,
My eyes seem to be so heavy,
But my body feels no pain,
Watching the clashing steel,
Does not make me insane.

Why do you close your eyes?
Why cant you see the lies?
If there is anything in here?
Maybe God will leave a sign.
Why cant you be that kind?
How could i be so blind?
I know there is something in here?
But God just left me behind.

I lay down in the cold and damp,
And im surrounded by the obsessed,
I wonder how to navigate and elminate,
The ones who are blessed,
As i start to see,
There the ones who think i am blessed.

Why do you close your eyes?
Why cant you see the lies?
If there is anything in here?
Maybe God will leave a sign,
Why cant you be that kind?
How could i be so blind?
I know there is something in here?
But God just left me behind.

who leaves us behind?
he just leaves us behind?
why would he leave us behind?
I might just leave myself behind.
He didnt leave you behind.

Its all for nothing

2009-04-10T23:25:00.000-07:00

I...pick up all the pieces,
I...save it from decay,
I...stare into the faces,
I...wont throw it away,
You dont seem to see,
Its apart of me,
It cant go away,
It is here to say,
All i do,
Is split in two,
Now think it through,
Its all come down to you,
And after everything,
Its all for nothing,
just throw me away,
and tear it away,
its all for nothing,
For fucking nothing.

Believe

2009-04-10T20:40:00.000-07:00

Im running in pace,

with the world,

got my mind set straight,

and no its not fake,

all the thoughts in my head,

but there lies instead,

so i run in pace with the world,

what can i achieve?

when hearing lies i start to believe,

theres a choice im stuck between,

and its down to what ive seen,

its all inside of me,

i can feel myself changin.

the walls start to break,

far away,

the blood is outside,

and there is panic in my eyes,

what do i do?

with myself,

ill make sure im safe,

then turn and throw all of me away,

what can i achieve?

when hearing lies i start to believe,

theres a choice im stuck between,

its down to what ive seen,

its all inside of me,

i can feel myself changin.

I cant see,

im wondering how to believe,

i will breathe,

and see what i can achieve,

i cant see,

im wondering how to believe,

i will breathe,

and see what i can achieve,

I am here inside you,

its not what you can see,

I am here inside you,

its not what i can see,

what can you see.

what can i see?

how do i get away

2009-01-10T23:20:00.000-08:00

Theirs a voice deep inside me
It started talking again
Its something no one else can see
It started shouting again
What a worthless piece of shit
Don't you fucking pretend
No one else can hear it
I'm here with no end

What happened to my face
The words are spoke very clear
The words with out any trace
Make my face fill with fear
And I cannot pretend
this is not an act
How do i get away
How do i
How do i

Its just my own reflection
It started talking to me
Keeps pointing in the wrong direction
Its just the mirror and me
Telling me to do things
That are sins to do
Pushes me to do things
Please just what do i do

What happened to my face
The words are spoke very clear
The words with out any trace
Make my face fill with fear
And i cannot pretend
This is not an act
How do i get away
How do i
How do i

please just get me far away
just take me far away
please just get me far away
just take me
just take me far away
How do i get away

Where ive come to sleep

2009-01-08T20:07:00.000-08:00

Its where Ive come to sleep
Its where you've come to sleep
And of you i will dream
Such a beautiful dream
And we will know
All the truths in the world
They will come
And see us sleeping here
All alone in the darkest place

Only you can see me
Only i can see you
And when we both touch
My heart beats just for you
And the hate will fade
Down in our hearts
We'll be changed into dust
And will blow far away
With the wind in the night
Its where I've come to sleep
Its made for you and me

Sound is breaking up

2009-01-08T17:05:00.000-08:00

The sound just keeps breaking up
All the way down in my ears
I swear don't you make that jump
I wont shed any tears
To much static will bring
A pain that you can hear
The strum of a string
Can take away the fear

Please just try to stay
It may be the only way
For you to save yourself
And i cant save myself
Please just try
Oh yes
Please just try
Just just

There is a monster inside
Inside i have been caught
Sometimes i get caught in a tide
But this is something that is not
I have grown to thirst
I wish i made the right turn
Very soon i will burst
And i will burn

Please just try to stay
It may be the only way
For you to save yourself
And i cant save myself
Please just try
Oh yes
Please just try
Just just

I will crawl inside

2009-01-07T22:31:00.000-08:00

Everything is turning
all the way from the best
i see that your burning
but its just a God damn test
as the shadows cast down a shelter
and i attempt to crawl inside
the world will seem to find her
and keep me on the outside

even if im crucified
even if im patronized
even if im criticized
even if your the one who lied
i will crawl inside

even when i taste your blood
i will chew, swallow and spit
there is so much dirty blood
they all just seem to fit
as my eyes start to tire
from hanging up so damn long
my blood is hotter then fire
and its been emptied all night long

even if im crucified
even if im patronized
even if im criticized
even if your the one who lied
i will crawl inside
i will
i will still
crawl inside

break down from the inside

2009-01-07T15:41:00.000-08:00

being in your head
Not knowing what you do
wishing you were dead
but we break and there is just two
falling to my knees
thinking of what Ive done
seeing your dead just please
Just don't block out the sun

Cant you feel it (song)

2009-01-07T08:37:00.000-08:00

In all the time
And in every place
Its what you cant find
And its all over the place
No one will see
What happened to you
Maybe its just me
But that cant be true

Cant you feel it deep in the fire
You just cant steal it your bound with wire
I'm starting to picture it deep in myself
It seems Ive fractured it all by myself
Oh i have fallen to a place i cant recognize
I see myself but i still dont realize
Maybe they will hang me to be crucified
Hearing everything someone has lied

In Close

2009-01-06T08:06:00.000-08:00

Cant you feel It?

2008-02-18T02:23:00.001-08:00

In all time, and in all places. No one will see.